Get Out of Porn, Part 3: Love vs Lust

Get Out of Porn, Part 3: Love vs Lust

I was talking to one of my favorite priests about the differences between love and lust.

I asked him point blank, “So, a teenager is usually full of hormones and sometimes they get so hot they almost self-combust. What does choosing real love over lust get them?”

He quietly replied, “The Cross.”

I was silent for a second. Truthfully, I wanted a better answer. “What do you mean, they will get the cross?”

“Lori, self-sacrifice is about learning how to love like Jesus Loved. And He loved us to death on the cross. Choosing real love over lust will get people the cross.”

“Father….who would willingly choose the cross?”

“Those that want to live in real peace and have true freedom.”

(“Choosing the cross” means loving others more than we love ourselves. It means being willing to die to our selfish impulses in order to build up our relationships and truly, the community around us.)

“Okay, but I am writing for high school and college-aged kids. I cannot tell them to embrace suffering for the sake of another. They would never buy that. NEVER.”

“Lori, you’d be surprised. There are many that are sick of our sexually-saturated culture.”

“How would you define real love?”

He grew quiet, thoughtful. “I’d say it is choosing the best for the other person, no matter what it personally costs.”

“The cross again.”

“Yes, the cross.”

“So, let’s say a teen is NOT in a relationship. Why would they willingly sacrifice? Let’s talk real here. Why would they give up porn?”

“Porn brings them pleasure, but it never lasts. And it always leaves them feeling worse. They KNOW that’s not real love.

“Many kids want to fight for real love. And if that involves sacrifice, their attitude is, ‘Bring it.’”

He grew thoughtful and then he added, “Real love is worth fighting for and many young people are willing to do that.”

“You give me great hope, Father.”

“I believe in our young people. They are going to change our culture.”

get out of porn part 3 love vs lust

Fight.For.Love.

Posts in this series:

Get out of Porn: The Introduction.

Get out of Porn, Part 1: The Brain.

Get out of Porn, Part 2: The Emotional Side.

Lori Doerneman

Lori Doerneman

I love my marriage consummated and my Jesus consecrated. I also love seeing the eternal in the ordinary tasks of every day life. That's why I write.
Lori Doerneman

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